Tuesday, January 25, 2011

The Bachelor...my weekly guilty pleasure

Ok, maybe I have one too many guilty pleasures. Teen Mom, American Idol (love the new judges by the way!), the Bad Girls Club, and the Bachelor. You probably think I sit on my couch for 5 hours every night watching crap reality tv, but, thanks to TIVO, I can zip through this episodes in 20 minutes to get my weekly dose of lunatics on tv.

I'm not sure why I'm so obsessed with the Bachelor. It's kind of  stupid concept, the girls always look like blubbering idiots when they leave...especially in the first couple episodes...c'mon ladies, you've known him for an hour long cocktail party..save the crocodile tears until you're back at your hotel room. I've watched from Alex Michel choosing the chick he had a whipped cream sundae night with and totally bumped uglies with as Trista cried in her hotel balcony next door. Then there was Aaron who picked the skeptical Helene only to never speak to her after the show. Then we had hottie Andrew Firestone...all the girls just wanted him for his money but kudos to him for picking the nice girl, Jen Schefft. Then we went on to a bad run of weirdos....Bob Guiney...c'mon...he was just excited to have 20 girls to talk to him..Jesse Palmer..the 4th string quarterback from somewhere...Byron...the one season I didn't watch! Shame on me but I was all set with the ladies picking the bachelor. Charlie O'Connell...we just know him as Jerry's brother. Travis Stork..the hottie from that show the Doctors..glad to see besides being the bachelor he's got a good head on his shoulders. Then we went down hill with that Prince Lorenzo...Dear ABC, the Bachelor needs to be cute! You failed with that season. Then Brad take 1, the weird English guy Matt, Jason, Jake then Brad take 2.

Sounds like a bunch of crap, but, I'm still addicted. Mr. Allan rolls his eyes, gets the laptop out, watches old episodes of House with the ear buds in when Tivo starts recording. But, I fully admit, there's no educational value in what I'm watching, I learn nothing, and take little out of my bachelor experience each week. So why do I watch? Purely for the entertainment value. And..I kind of think Brad Womack is hot..so watching him on TV isn't too rough on the eyes.

So, if you're a Bachelor fan, here's my weekly wrap up of the poop I watched on ABC last night.....

Now that we're a few weeks into this season, things start to get good. There's only one or two girls who you look at and think..who the heck is that? What's her name? They're what I call the disposable contestants..taking up space at the rose ceremonies but get no camera time at the group dates or in footage at the house and they're usually good for at least a hysterical crying scene as they get in the limo and the Bachelor struggles to remember their names to bid them farewell. This is also the time where front runners emerge...we have Chantal...I married my high school sweet heart divorcee, the Ashleys...they're both bubbly cheerleader types..I can only tell the difference between the two because one has a bigger forehead than the other. We have the funeral director girl, the quiet girl name Brit Brit and a handful of others that kind of blend in. Then we have some front runners...Emily, the absolutely beautiful southern belle with the story that breaks your heart. When she was 18 she was engaged and pregnant but didn't know it. Her race car driver fiance got on a plane, she stayed back because she was sick and pregnant but didn't know it. The plane crashed, he died, and she then found out she was pregnant. Sounds like a soap opera but it sure did reel me in!

Then...we move onto to the crazy chick. It doesn't even look like ABC has to even try hard in the editing room. She's threatened to beat chicks up, she's certifiable crazy but hot, so, of course, Brad doesn't see it. But, this week's kicker...she somehow gave herself a black eye in her sleep??? C'mon crazy michelle..at least make up a drunk story to support it!

Here's the crazy lady trying to figure out how she got a black smudge, I mean black eye.

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